Hottest Styles, every shoe, every color.

Social media is a relatively large part of my life. ...Okay, it is my life.

I've got Facebook, YouTube, a blog. But there's two things that I don't have: Twitter and Tumblr.

I know what you're thinking, "Why do you need Twitter if you've already got Facebook?" and "Why do you need Tumblr if you already have a blog?" and maybe "Stop trying to read my mind, you're bad at it."

You see, Facebook and Twitter are two verryyyyy different things.

• Facebook is about connecting with your friends and keeping up to date with their lives. (It's also about making sure to like the photo because you do want to go to Heaven.) 

• Twitter is about connecting with everyone. You can follow celebrities and your friends-- it's the best of both worlds. (And on Twitter you can use hash-tags and not be #ridiculedbyyourpeers.)

A blog like...well, this and Tumblr are basically polar opposites.

• This blog is more for talking about my life and what's on my mind and trying to exceed Joel's expectations thereby winning a broken owl. 

• Tumblr is about talking about your life and what's on your mind and talking about celebrities and what's on their minds. (It's also for cute gifs of Harry Styles, but I'll spare you the details.)

Don't get me wrong, Facebook's nice and this blog is pretty fun. But Twitter's nicer and Tumblr is even more fun.

Synchronous Diaphragmatic Flutters

I don't know about you guys, but I am plagued by hiccups almost daily.

Sadly, this is not the hiccup I'm talking about.

I'm talking about synchronous diaphragmatic flutters. Boy, that's a mouth-er...keyboard-ful?

Anyway, a hiccup is an involuntary contraction of the diaphragm.

Once this reflex is triggered, the diaphragm contracts sharply and is followed by closure of the vocal cords 0.25 seconds later, which is what causes us to make the "hic" sound.

The exact cause of hiccups is still up for debate, but most people believe it has something to do with the pace of our eating.

There are countless remedies for hiccups including:

1. Drinking water whilst upside down. (In reality, all this does is get water up your nose. Not very effective, if you ask me.)

2. Holding your breath for as long as you can. (This is actually very helpful. Holding your breath builds up your carbon dioxide levels which helps your diaphragm relax or something weird like that. IDK.)

3. A spoonful of peanut butter. (This doesn't help. At all. If anything, it makes the situation worse because you can't really chew peanut butter but you can't just swallow it whole like that and it hurts when it goes down because it's just like AHH PEANUT BUTTER so I don't recommend this.)

4. A spoonful of sugar. (I don't know why this works, but it does. And it's delicious too so. Win-win.)

Summer can't get here fast enough.

I think we can all agree that we have had some amazing weather these past few days. It's warm and sunny and bright and it feels like summer is almost here, right? 

Wrong.

There is currently 96 days, 7 hours, 19 minutes and 12 seconds until the summer solstice, which is more relatively known as "the first day of summer."

This is a...well, for lack of a better word, it's a bummer. 

I'm really looking forward to summer this year. I don't know, it just all feels different. It feels like this summer can finally be about letting go and having fun with some of my best friends. 

Summer only lasts three months. Then it's back to school and monotonous routines. No more spur-of-the-moment plans. No more chasing after the ice-cream truck. No more late-night swims.

That's why this summer I'm making it a goal to have as much fun as I possibly can. I'm talking sleep-overs, pool parties, beach trips; basically anything and everything I can do to make this the best summer of my life.

Summer is about making new friends, growing closer to current friends, and reconnecting with old ones. Summer is about making a fool of yourself and not caring what people think. Summer is about shooting for the stars. Summer is about conquering your fears. Summer is about swan dives off the highest diving board. Summer is about midnight Skype calls. Summer is about afternoon iced-coffee get-togethers with your best friend. Summer is about your stomach hurting from laughing so much. Summer is about ice-cream fights. Summer is about running barefoot in the grass. Summer is about holding your breath as you jump into the pool. Summer is about singing loudly in the car with your friends. Summer is about fireworks. Summer is about long, warm nights. Summer is about roasting marshmallows around a bonfire. Summer is about the butterflies you get when he/she smiles. Summer is about mis-matched shoelaces. Summer is about popcorn and movie marathons. Summer is about chasing your dreams. 

Summer is about never wanting it to end.

Summer is about living. Summer is about you.

Bionic Bloodhounds

Setting: a Paraguayan dog-show
Tone: Joyful
Genre: Action
Written by: Jordyn, Logan, Madeline, Bonnie and Joel

(Jordyn) The year was 2461; a great year for middle eastern countries. (Well, great when it came to dogs. The rest of the country was almost completely wiped out.) Paraguay had spent most of its funds on a secret experiment involving dogs and computers. They hoped to combine the two to create what they hoped would be the world's smartest dog. You wouldn't have to teach it to sit or stay, or not to bark when you have company over; it was built in to it. It wouldn't be instinctive or impulsive. It would always be the ideal dog. But something happened... something terrible. No one would tell is what happened, so my friends and I decided to get to the bottom of it. We spent weeks- no, months planning. We had finally made it in...

(Maddie) ...to the Paraguayan dog show when we were attacked! The building that the dog show was held in had been taken over by the fearsome computer-dogs. It was very exciting to be attacked by the dogs, I was thrilled to have been a part of the experience. There were very few people left alive in the building. Those who were living had locked themselves into a very large bathroom. My friends and I fought our way through the halls of the building, trying to find a way to stop these ferocious dogs!

(Bonnie) The dogs had become so smart that they were updating themselves. It was amazing how some of them became surgeons adding all kinds of gadgets. We finally made it to the bathroom where an army of dogs now stood. Some were trying to get into the bathroom; others were at-the-ready. I smiled as my friends and I attacked. Our computer genius was outside trying to hack into their programming to shut them down. But me and my friends had to save these last people. We fired away; one of us was down, then two. But the dogs were falling faster. I saw my best friend die, those dogs were dead meat. I felt more alive than ever...

(Logan) ...as I ripped the metal head off one of the dogs, screeching my triumph. Another one jumped at me from the side, its razor-sharp claws swinging at my neck and face. I leaped to the side just in time, causing the dog to smash into the wall behind me. I was blind with fury now as I charged...

(Joel) ...toward the bionic bloodhounds. I spun with fury, my legs taking out dogs two at a time with effective round-houses. My fists flew like pistons as wave after wave of robot dogs poured out of their kennels. The room was a whirlwind of sparks and bolts as the dogs shattered against my thrusts. I felt as though I was being controlled by some outside influence. As I looked down at my hands choking a Doberman to death, I realized my skin had melted away to reveal black gun metal where my bones and flesh should have been. Confused, I looked back to my computer genius who I thought was trying to hack the system. He was sweating with excitement mashing buttons on a Play Station controller that was controlling my fists and legs. Behind him, a crowd of thousands of spectators were cheering ballistically. The scoreboard above me had me in the lead. I was a robot built for bionic battling and I had three more dogs to go before setting the high score for my creator.

Skills I Would Love To Have

1. Be able to distinguish the differences between the calls of the Ivory-billed Woodpecker from the Ivory-billed Woodcreeper.

2. Correctly estimate the square-footage of every room I walk into. 

3. Open pickle jars on the first try.

4. Kill a spider without panicking.

5. Be able to have a water balloon fight at thirty-paces. 

6. Master pig-latin. 

7. Be able to be a professional pogo-stick..er-person-thing. 

8. Identify what brand of potpurri it is simply by smelling it. 

9. Be able to levitate. 

10. Do an impression of Morgan Freeman. 

Am I the only one that feels this way?

You know that feeling when you find a TV show that you love instantly and you start obsessing over it and shipping the characters and go on tumblr and find cute gifs of them and it makes you want to cry because they're just so amazing? 

But then the show's directors and whatnot decide that they want to break the hearts of innocent US spectators because it's filmed in Canada and Canada is a jerk and doesn't let America watch the show anymore even though we all totally loved it and even petitions don't work because Canada is stupid?

And then you find another show to love and take the place of the other one even though nothing will ever fill the hole in your heart that the first show left?

And you find tumblrs completely dedicated to the new show and all of a sudden the internet is full of people that are just as obsessed over the show as you are and it's like you've been adopted into the ideal family?

But then the new show you love throws a huge plot twist in your face and you think "WELL IT TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH" and then you realize what they just did and you can't even deal and you hyperventilate and cry because it's just so great and it's finally happening?

But while you're celebrating this amazing occurrence the TV show makes you wait two more weeks for a new episode and you don't know what you do with your life anymore so you spend all of your time trying to figure out a way to speed up the earth's rotation therefore making time pass quicker so you can watch the new episode sooner?

You guys know that feeling?

(Or do I just take TV too seriously...)

Only the cutest thing you'll see all day.

 I was feeling a bit down, and then I got bored.

Warning: This post may cause you to hug and/or adopt your computer screen.

Oh goodness. A tiny rocking chair.

That's right. It's in a teacup. 

I can't deal.

Last, but certainly not least...

Like what the heck is this. It's too small to even function.